Prego -- Left behind?

Every time I turn around it seems that someone new is pregnant. I log into Facebook and on someone's wall are posts of congratulations. I see friends glowing and growing rounder with each new day. I'm happy for them, really I am, but part of me wonders if I'm being left behind.

Jon and I discussed we would wait a couple years after being married before starting a family. We've been married one year now and are still planning on waiting another year before we conceive. I know I want to wait another year because I'm still adjusting to Jon's new job and I want to have all of our credit cards paid off, which by next year will be done.

But then comes the pressure of family. I was the last of my family to get married, as was Jon. All of my married brothers have children, except one (his wife cannot have children). My brother Josh had his first child right after his second year of college and his second child during his fourth year (he went to 4 1/2 years of college). My younger brother John followed suit and had his first child in the middle of his third year and is planning to have another one right after he graduates college (year 5). Josh was married at the beginning of his second year and John was married right before his third year. So both of them have been married longer than I have. Josh almost 4 years and John 1 year. I waited until I graduated college to get married.

As a result of my waiting to get married, my nieces and nephews are getting older and I never seem to hear the end of comments like "our children need cousins" or "you should have children" or "you should be next to have kids." I know that we're going to have children, but not yet. And it's frustrating on one hand to have my family constantly nag me about having children and another that I know there are other things I want to do right now without being strapped down with children. Your life changes when you have kids; I've seen in happen.

Part of me would love to have children right now, but at the same time I know that Jon and I aren't ready. Some times, particularly when I hear about another pregnant friend, I want to have kids sooner, but practically speaking I know we aren't ready yet. We want to have our credit cards to paid off and some money in savings before we had a child to the mix. I know I will be working less when we have kids, so I want to make sure we have our credit cards paid off and some money saved up. I want to have some debt paid off. I know we're not going to be completely debt free and I'm fine with that, but if we can reduce it some then that's great for us.

Sometimes I have felt left behind by those having babies now. But all in all, I'm glad I don't have kids yet. I'm not ready yet. We're not ready yet. I'm happy for now not having children. For now I'm content not having children. I'm not left behind. I'm waiting until it's right for me, for us.